Thursday, November 13, 2014

Categorized & Pigeon-Holed

Generalizing, in my opinion, is the same as being lazy, intentionally dumb, and creating a stereotype.

People seem to love doing that. I think it's something most people who think they're smarter than everyone else likes to do. Just like people who love to hear themselves talk tend to be ignorant and stupid more often than not.

It's kind of scathing of me to start off something like that, but it was something I read yesterday. Normally not much gives me a reaction unless it is specific with me personally. Or if it's someone who thinks they're smarter than everyone else and comes off as condescending and pretentious. That's my biggest pet peeve. I used to know someone like that in high school (though then again, a lot of teens are like that to begin with).

It was an opinion piece that I had to read for one of my classes (we were going to use that as well as a couple others as an example in how go about editing someone's opinion for publishing). It was recent and had to do with the whole Ghomeshi media circus. The article was basically about how the "pain he inflicted" (because that is definitely factual and proven truth) was part of a larger issue in relation to misogyny against women.

I didn't have any issue with that. I don't have a voice on it because I don't think I know enough to comment, other than to think that it probably matters. The ridiculous thing that actually angered me was the author's line that few men do not have anti-feministic rage somewhere in their psyche.

In other words, few men (altogether) do not somehow, some way or another, have a rage against the opposite sex simply for being the opposite sex.

His article had some psychological observations from a real source. Men, particularly men from single-parent families where the father was absent and the environment was not perfectly normal or okay, grew up developing frustration towards their mothers until it eventually evolved towards women altogether. The anti-feministic, paternal rage develops until it is obvious in some form or another within the man's psyche.

Considering that the author said 'few' men, I got the impression that he basically meant 'virtually none.'

It didn't stop there. Anyone who thought different was in hopeless denial.

It's a simple generalization. To bring it home, the author went and used himself as an example, saying that even he has unfortunately expressed this rage against his wife. "I'm no better," basically. I appreciate it when those who preach put themselves at the same level as those to which they preach, removing any self-elevation or perfection, but in this case he's regretfully making himself a part of his generalization, causing the reader to feel like it's no doubt true because even the author admits it. Therefore every man must be like this.

I'm not fully disagreeing with or discrediting the author. There is absolutely no doubt that many men have this 'rage,' and that it is a problem. But it is not an inevitable thing that happens to every male regardless of anything.

I took it pretty personally. I grew up in a single mother household. My father was absent when I was born. He went to Cambodia after deciding he wasn't ready to be a dad, came back briefly, and then went to Africa. I never really spent any time with him until I was five or six, and I didn't really see him as my dad until I was seven. He didn't fully seem to act like one (by which I mean annoying lectures on my health habits) until I was a pre-teen. When I was a child he seemed more like a really cool friend, with his roommates/friends other really cool friends. Yet I think that to base something or find issue with someone based merely on their gender to be the stupidest idea ever.

I don't understand why people take issue with it. Men and women share 99% of the same genes. They are human. The only differences are certain biological ones and certain differences in the way both think. Differences, not weaknesses or strengths. Otherwise, everything is changeable. Women don't have to have long hair and men don't have to have it short, and both are free to dress however they like (although most of the world probably thinks differently of that). There's nothing (or should be nothing) stopping that. They say women have weaker arms? That makes no sense at all. They are perfectly capable of weight training if their arms are weaker to begin with, and weaker compared to what? None of that nonsense is set in stone or absolute.

Gender inequality or issue of any kind is as stupid and nonsensical as racial inequality or discrimination, or sexual orientation issues. We evolved this way, yet we pigeon-hole ourselves into categories and set expectations on one and create allowances for the other. We create differences that might as well move in the opposite direction of our evolution, humanity, and abilities. If I had an issue with a woman, it's because she specifically created that issue, not because "she's a woman and therefore she did it naturally." The majority of us don't seem to understand what 'natural' is I don't think - and I'm not saying everyone. There are no doubt many out there who do.

We need to recognize that humans are simply humans - not men and women and white and black and straight and gay and this and that. We have one life. Might as well do whatever you want to make it fun and interesting. Who should care if you're a man or a woman, if you're black or aboriginal or otherwise, or if you're attracted to guys or both guys and girls. The world shouldn't have any issue with you. You're a natural human being with strengths and flaws and compassion and everything else specific to you, and only you. Everyone has their own differences, so to generalize that into an entire pointless category is just being dumb with effort. I'm a man. I don't have any pointless anti-feministic rage against any female. Am I amazingly unique to my gender? I don't think so.

By the way, until police actually find out in an investigation what evidence points to whatever truth and solves everything together, I'm not interested in listening to or watching a scandal wail about how misogynistic and horrible and repudiating that Ghomeshi character is. Let authorities have the final word, not anger-driving, negative media. If those claims are true, I commend those women who had the strength to use their voices - which they have and deserve to use. If they aren't - some people sure are disgusting. I know what it's like to have my reputation tarnished.

Red Cloud
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